The Past

I wish to write about the past without intention of hurting someone... without intention of believing it but with the intention to relive the happy memories that once has happened in my life... yes... for once i loved and was loved in return... but love now has to go... his heart has a new owner now and life must move on even if life won't... the past... what's one thing in the past i can't forget? *thinks thinks thinks*... well i say i can't forget EVERYTHING... from the moment jenny introduced him to the moment I’ve decided to let go of the things really not meant for me... to let go of the love... the past maybe... it hurts to feel the memories once again... but this is my choice... i need to let go of my feelings.. the feelings that i never even told you that was there all along... i miss so much your text messages... and how i wished i replied to all of it... i miss so much your phone calls... which i took for granted before... i miss so much the way u call me baby... i miss so much our night outs with mom... i miss so much the fun we had... our fights... our sorries... oh how i missed so much ur basketball games with my bros.. i miss ur weekend visits... til u go home late at night.. i miss so much ur company on new year's eve, christmas eve and on ordinary days... how i wished i let you make feel how special it is rather than ruin it with my mood swings... i miss so much your i love u's; & nytie; and take care my babyi miss so much ur voice on the phone.. i miss so much the songs that u used to play me i miss so much the times we hold hands and hide it from mom... it seems so silly of us.. i miss the way you hold my hand and the way u put ur arms on my shoulder... i feel so secure... i miss so much your YOU... oh how i missed ur love... yet let past be bast... i wish i didn't have to hurt you the past... i miss it... as i promised i won't linger much to it... i won't hurt someone... i won't hurt myself... i just want the past to be a part of me now... i don't want it erased... but i just have to learn and live with it... i love him but i can't fight for him... it doesn't mean it's not love... love is unexplainable... it's just that sometimes when we love we have to let go even if we don't won't to for them to be happy... sometimes in life too we need to let go of the person we really love.. God works in mysterious ways... who knows... he wants us to let go to give space to the one that could love us more... i hope i'll find him... love u past! but you will remain as past... that’s all you’ll ever be.....